Well what can i say there're so many things on my mind like my studies, my parents, my brother and the way he's been behaving. It kindda sucks to be the oldest, where u always have to be strong for everyone to lean on you. My mum turns to me for everything after i returned from sailing. I mean it's nice to noe that she thinks that im responsible and all but it's all a little too much for me.
I feel so lonely these days. Although i have my friends around me, all the time there isn't anyone who i can really talk to, or shd i say there isn't anyone whom i feel comfortable around to speak with. I've been through alot of crap onaboard and when everyone asks me how was sailing i juz smile and say it was great but i don't wanna tell them the difficulties i had to go through, the words i had to endure and the labour i was put through.
It's all nice and shiny on the outside but it sucks on the inside to be a cadet that is. Once i become an officer i'm gonna fuck all the mother fuckers who played punk with me!!! watch out you son's of bitches!!! And there's this thing bout ppl whom i've lost ppl whom used to matter so much before i went sailing, whom were always there seem so distant and im afraid to approach them cuz it juz isn't the same anymore.tsk tsk And well yesssss there is the part where i lost a certain amount of money when i bet loosing it to Singapore pools, But i wldn't say it was all for waste it taught me alot, on how to bet and how not to bet... The best thing to do wld be not to bet but what the heck u gotta take some risks now and then. Although i don't think $8000 was worth the lesson learnt i guess things don't come cheap in life huh : )
I juz need Strength at the moment strength to carry myself forward and to move on, Hope- hope that better things will come my way and so does someone who will always be ard and Luck -luck so that i always stay lucky : D see now that wasn't so bad... I feel better already.
And i wld really appreciate those reading these entries to please comment with ur own names and not tag as anonymous .... Please la i don't bite u noe.
4 comments:
Dun be emo can anot? faggot
who emo??? i stress la bitch. who's this anyway ah??hehehe
hmmm. just pull through and finish your course. i think sailing's frigging awesome. and cadets are hot. ntg comes easy dude.
haha yea i guess sailing is wonderful juz the ppl frm diff countries all kindda seem to hate singaporeans... As a country i think we're doing very badly ah.hahaha thanks for comment by the way : )
Post a Comment